College Student Maintains "Masculinity Isn't Toxic" & Causes Bar Fight

With sexism pretty much out of the picture, men and women are treated equally. It is a kind of gender utopia for the binary (genders that matter). You see white men all the time able to proudly assert they are a feminist. Domestic abuse is pretty much eradicated. We did it, internet. WE WON!

There are still, however, plenty of speed bumps along the way. Not for women, of course. We got what we wanted: Attention. But men, especially cis white men, are being treated like garbage. Victory is sweet, but some women don’t know how to win gracefully.

Broad Boxxx is normally a sex advice blog, but today we wanted to take a look at a social injustice. Nothing is sexier than being politically and socially informed… by content on the internet with no hyperlinks, sources, or experts. 

Chad (name changed for privacy) was having a few drinks at the bar with his friends. They were playing a game they often play after this many beers (12) to see who could get the hottest phone number.

“We all have to buy a drink for the guy that gets the hottest girl’s phone number and a drink for the guy that gets the ugliest girl’s phone number because we want to be equal, right?” Chad explained.

As the night went on, Courtney, a hot girl, overheard them catcalling another pretty lady and bravely stepped it. Courtney stood up for the women.

“Women aren’t phone numbers, they’re people,” the hot blonde said in a statement to the campus newsletter. “These guys were making a competition out of us when we were just there to have a good time with our friends. It’s sick.”

Chad got heated in the argument with Courtney at the bar. She was trying to calmly explain “toxic masculinity”, a fake expression for guys being guys that cunts use, and Chad knew better than to let this bitch ruin their fun time.

“I had heard that phrase before because, ya know, I’m in college and girls are pretending they get raped all the time,” Derren, a member of Chad’s posse, recalled. “But when you say it in person, it’s kind of offensive to guys and I think that’s why Chad kind of wigged out.”

Witnesses at the bar unanimously reported that Chad yelled, “Masculinity isn’t toxic!” before taking a bar stool over his head and smashing it against the bar. The debris hit Courtney, causing her to scream, and all of the men in the bar rushed over to defend her. Chad reflexively punch anybody that seemed like a threat. 

“A huge bar fight broke out,” Courtney explained. “I was being pushed away while all these guys were hitting each other. I don’t even know if those guys that came to help knew why I was screaming, but they totally made the situation worse.”

Chad blames Courtney for the outburst while Courtney firmly blame “toxic masculinity”. Only one of those is real, and it’s obviously Courtney. However, her poor behavior is a lesson to all of us women.

Leaving men to behave they way they want is the ultimate path to a more peaceful state of gender relations. You can’t keep bringing up old arguments about fake stuff that doesn’t matter. Be a little more chill when you might otherwise get mad.

It isn’t about you or sexism. You as an individual women don’t stand a chance against a group of men and sexism isn’t really a problem anymore because women can vote and get jobs and stuff.

Relax, ladies.